Holding a Mirror Up to Your Relationships: How Your Inner Circle Impacts Your Ambition and Empowerment
“Your are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.”
Whether we like it or not, we reflect the characteristics of the people we surround ourselves with. But when was the last time you held up a mirror to your relationships—your partner, colleagues, friends, or even family—and asked: are they empowering you or holding you back?
This is especially important for ambitious women navigating leadership roles or growing a business. In my work as a leadership and business coach for women, I’ve seen first-hand how your inner circle can either amplify your growth or quietly sabotage it.
Do you remember your mum saying, “They’re a bad influence”? Well, she was right. And while you may have swapped White Diamond perfume for a crisp Sauvignon Blanc or cigarettes for a hazelnut latte, the principle remains: who you spend your time with matters deeply.
Our relationships influence our mindset, our decisions, our self-worth—and ultimately our capacity to lead, grow, and achieve success on our own terms.
The Subtle Influence of Relationships on Women in Leadership
Let’s take Annabel as an example. She’s eyeing a promotion at work. To get it, she’ll need to upskill and better understand the department she wants to join.
But her closest colleague undermines the idea, making snide remarks about the boss and spreading gossip. Annabel’s family? They tell her to stay put—“You’ve got a good job, don’t rock the boat.” Her partner? He gently plants seeds of doubt: “Are you ready for more hours… more pressure?” Sound familiar?
Here we have projection, fear, guilt, and fixed mindset all swirling around Annabel—subconsciously holding her back. This is what I call subtle sabotage, and it’s one of the most common themes I work through in life coaching for women in leadership and transition.
So, let’s flip the mirror. Ask yourself: are the people closest to me reflecting back the person I want to become?
Time for a Relationship Audit? Start Here:
Here are five powerful questions to help you assess whether your relationships are aligned with your future goals:
1. What am I learning from this relationship? Do they challenge you to grow? Are they curious, kind, loyal, fun? Do they offer knowledge, perspective, and emotional support—or just gossip and distractions?
2. What have I discovered about myself through this connection? Do they help you find courage, clarity, and confidence? Or are you left doubting your dreams? Powerful relationships reveal who we’re becoming.
3. Can I strengthen this relationship? Some relationships deserve effort. Do you need to reconnect with your partner beyond the logistics of daily life? Can you invest time in people who light you up?
4. Do these people empower me to grow? Are they cheering you on, offering real talk from a place of love, and helping you become the leader you want to be? Or do they subtly dim your light?
5. Do I need to let go? If the answer is mostly “no,” it’s time to create space. Set boundaries. Say no. Reassess. This isn’t about cruelty—it’s about choosing yourself, your future, your purpose.
Your Network Affects Your Net Worth—Emotionally and Professionally
If you want to thrive in business, leadership, and life, you must be intentional about your relationships. This is especially true for women striving for gender equality in the workplace, launching a business, or stepping into senior roles.
Surround yourself with empowering women, allies, mentors, and friends who challenge your thinking and open doors. This is a core principle in my coaching for ambitious women, where we build personal power through aligned connections, bold vision-setting, and fearless action.
So—who’s in your corner?
Choose Relationships That Make You Feel Limitless
When you have the right people by your side—those who support without judgment, offer new perspectives, and encourage you to keep going—you start to believe that anything is possible. You feel positive, focused, and on-purpose.
Ask yourself now: What kind of future do I want? And who is going to help me get there?
Seek those people out. Be brave enough to let go of what no longer serves you. This is your time to rise.
Checkout my #fridaytakeaway video below if you’re more of a video person…